+ confessions of a red-headed stepchild: holy-mother-fucking-shit

Sunday, August 21, 2005

holy-mother-fucking-shit

I am horrible about blogging on the spot. I am a procrastinator and often post about things that have happened at least a week past. But with all the windup regarding this skydiving trip I feel like I owe you a first hand account of what happened.

As I have mentioned previously, I was in complete denial of what I had gotten myself into, but reality settled in as we were approaching 10,000 feet, crammed shoulder to shoulder in a tiny plane. I realized the intensity of my situation when my instructor told me we were going to "dive out" of the plane. I asked him if there were an easier way to do it and he laughed at me. He could tell I was nervous because he kept telling me things to do that would make someone who was absolutely petrified feel better, and the fact that he could tell I was nervous was making me MORE NERVOUS.

The door at the back of the plane opened and we could barely hear each other speak. The line started moving and I couldn't think twice about my footing or the fact that I was going to be plummeting to my death if all the things I signed off on the waiver came to fruition. You could see the bodies drop out of the door, quickly out of sight and then all of a sudden my feet were at the edge of the plane and then we were flying.

I am a screamer and my throat is sore because we were free falling for 56 seconds which required me to scream "oh my god" and "fuck" over and over and over again until the chute came out and we popped back up into the air and 125 miles per hour slowed to an eagles soar. The ground came up to meet my feet too quickly.

The sense of accomplishment is almost as amazing as the adrenaline rush.

I didn't pay the additonal money for the pictures, but if I did I am sure it would have looked something like this.